the pursuit of knowledge
01.29.04 (11:00 am) [edit]hello friends. i am fresh off the press, from completing my taks field test, so forgive me if i seem a little up there, due to the high and lofty thought required on that dumb test. it was actually hard. i was thourghly surprised. the topic was serendipity...i never really understood that concept, and i'm going to pray that doesn't show through bright clear in my essay, and open questions. anyway....to the point here.
it's quite odd. all my senior friends are all starting to be like, "o ya, i'm going here. " or "i'm going there." everytime i hear one talk such talk i can hardly keep myself from bursting into tears. i think i will cry more at this year's graduation than i will at my own next year. lol. *sniffle* we're all growing up sooo fast!! lol i think the only reason i cry is because of the impending fear of losing all those people that have made a true impact on my life. you know who i'm talking about... that one kid you've been friends with since you were in the womb practically, or your first date, or the one that you got in a fight with so many times, just so you could make up again, cause you knew your parents would treat you to ice cream when ya'll got in a fight. all those memories. aye, i'm going to make myself cry right here in the middle of bcis. lol. i would laugh at myself...if i were not me. lol.
do you know what? i used to be afraid of knowing too much. you know why? cause all the people i knew that were really really smart didn't believe in God or had such distorted views of God, i could hardly see God in their god. i had always heard an albert einstein quote... it went something like "the more i study, the more i know there has to be a higher being" i couldn't really grasp that, as i had not studied that much, but now that i do study, i have found that to be oh so true. God has to be out there, cause there is no way that everything could just bang into exsistence the way it is, or evolve into the way it is. its just too complex. also the more i learn, i realize that God is way up there in intelligence and i am not to understand all He has done, is doing, or will do.
so, that is my blog for now. i must go now, and put together my notebook for anatomy, cause mrs. kinslow is a meany head and takes a grade on our organization skills, which are virtually non existant here...except when i feel like organizing, then everything either gets trashed, or goes in a very specific place. anyway. laters and God bless you all
back by popular demand
01.27.04 (9:53 am) [edit]ta da!! here i am again...in bcis. yippie *sarcasm* i am back writting by popular demand! well...greg's demand anyway, lol. so are ya happy greg?! i've written so adios! j/k. j/k. i will actually write something. now, what i write being of interest, is not under garuntee. :D you know you love me. yesterday in history, i learned something extremly interesting, thanks to a certain very blonde at heart brunette that will not be named *cough*marissa*cough*. this very intelligent lady informed me that a mr. jefferson davis was at one point a general in the union army during the civil. this was news to me, and my history teacher-the dud-since dud nearly had a heartattack right there. "has she learned nothing?!" cried the ailing teacher. *tsk, tsk* maybe we all need to pay attention more. not like i have room to talk, nearly the entire class, including myself was nodding off during the entire lecture yesterday...just something about a monday being a blue....those just don't work well together. as this week is a blue week, i will only be in bcis twice this week. i know, i know, i cry too. lol.
do you know what i've discovered? i'm losing my toe...haha, got ya *nudge, nudge*, toe nail :wink: you know why? (that's the incredible part.) cause i dropped a shelf on my toe sIx MoNtHs ago!!! and its just now popping off...right before spring tennis. this good...this is rEaL good *sarcasm* so, you will see me on the court this spring walking a little lop sided, due to the huge bulk of tape, and wrap on my big toe. please don't laugh while i hobble...you might just get a tennis ball in your teeth. *BWAHAHAAHAHAHA* j/k i don't mind being your object of scorn!!! lol
for those of you who have your own tblog...what do you guys do with your tbucks? i can't figure out what to do with mine. they just kinda sit there, and gather dust. i think i might just get me a lil top border thing...but only to replace it with my own picture...just do i have the html so i can put my blog name on there, cause i don't know that much html! cause i'm not that smart. lol.
well, it seems i have just been assigned only 500 assignments for this dumb class...ok so maybe its only like 2, but big deal. those dumb assignments cut into my internet time. :cry: i will cry. but anywho, talk to you all later! God bless!
i laugh at you
01.23.04 (10:32 am) [edit]yes i do laugh at you. you know why? cause you were suckered into reading my blog at this time. i don't feel like blogging today. i'm going to do one of those rediculous surveys instead *BWAHAHAHAHA* i have the power. so ttfn! God bless, too!
strange discoveries
01.21.04 (10:52 am) [edit]well, the past few days have been interesting. i'll give them that. bcis might actually require some thought, so forgive me if i don't make the most sense. 0:-)....tblog reallly needs a smiley emoticon...that really bugs me. anyway...i'll go with the lighter hearted stuff first. some very strange things have turned up at the tennis courts here lately.... one day i was just walking along, minding my own business, as i carried myself to the tennis hut before practice started. and low and behold there on the court was a half eaten slice of pizza! and it was hamburger too! what a waste of good pizza! they could have given it to me! i would have eaten it glady, especially since it was gatti's pizza, and not school pizza. :D *sigh* even if they didn't give it to me, they should have thought about that poor starving ethiopian that would have died to have that half eaten slice of delicious hamburger pizza for their family. it would have feed an entire village for at least a day, maybe several days! shesh. what incosiderate people live in america.
another strange occurence on the tennis courts *duh, nuh, nuh* another inconsiderate person marched themselves onto that same court with the delicious half eaten slice of hamburger pizza on it and burned down our tennis net! maybe they ate the pizza while the burnt down the net...or maybe they ordered pizza in celebration of defeating that mighty tennis net!! *BWAHAHAHAHA* they shouted to the heavens. i can hear 'em now. can you? i thought so. there is now lil drips of burnt plastic near our brand new net now, to remind all of the sacrafice that first net made in the name of tennis! *tear* well, now that we've all had our fun, on to more serious topics.
that one day that i went to wal-mart to buy the first batch of food for simeon, i thought i saw someone i recognized. i wasn't sure it was her, due to her condition and overly applied make-up. this girl that i saw was obviously in her third tri-mester, and knew that i knew her, and was ashamed of herself. i could see it in her eyes. her eyes just spoke to me, as if to say, "please don't talk to me. i don't want to explain myself." so, complying with her plea i didn't speak to her, just smiled and continued on with my shopping. i wasn't sure she was who i thought she is, until yesterday, when it was confirmed that that was her, cynthia. i inquired of the person who had informed me that indeed cynthia had gotten herself in quite a mess, where she had gone to, since i hadn't seen her at school in a good long while. i found out where she's gone to, but since my source is not very reliable, i'm not gonna stick it on here. don't wish this blog to become gossips' central. it just sadens me to see this paticular girl in such a fix. she had life going for her. she sat in front of me in biology freshman year, so i got to know her pretty well. she was an honor student, a nice church going girl and a terrific basketball player. where she's gone, there are no honor classes, or honor students, or athletes....just students that are trying to scrape by by the skin of their teeth. my heart goes out to her. not to say what she's done is acceptable, it just goes to show how two similar people can part life courses forever with one single choice. she's out there, preparing for her child's arrival sometime this month, as a more reliable source informed me-best friend of cynthia-, and just doing her best to graduate, while i am still here in honor classes, with honor students, striving to be the terrific athlete like she was, and could have been.
sorry to joggle you guys' emotions today, but it all needed to be said, cause that's how life goes-filled with fun, laughter, and games on moment, and tears, disappointment, and pain the next. be praying for cynthia and her baby guys. thanks. God bless.
forgiveness
01.16.04 (10:04 am) [edit]hehe. i'm not crazy *shakes head* i promise 0:-) anyway.... about my last blog... i was in the height of my anger there. after the fact, a few verses popped into my head... the "love is..." section popped into my head almost immediatly. but the part that stood out was the "love keeps no record of when it has been wronged." i have fallen there. here on this blog, for all the world to see, i've fallen flat on my face! now, that's really sad and all, but yet it's terrific as well. but the only way it can be terrific is if you, my web reader, will learn from my mistake. the other verse that popped into my head is from the Lord's prayer "forgive me, as i have forgiven those who have trespassed against me" soo...it seems i am in danger of not being forgiven by God since i have not forgiven coach of what she's done. and if i'm not careful, that unforgivness will turn to bitterness, and as i have already learned this past year, bitterness does not disappear over night. so, i figure i had better get over this whole mess purty quick in order a) keep myself in God's grace, and b) in case coach happened to wander across this-or anyone on the team for that matter-save myself from a ton of running. so, i am sorry, coach. now, if only those words would make the list of c-rap she's done in my head go away. that will take a little work, but hey, i'm on my way! yeah!! if only i had learned that lesson several years ago...perhaps i wouldn't be like i am today. i wonder how i'd be...that's an interesting thought. if i hadn't gotten bitter towards josh and what he did to me. *sigh* i guess i had better get in contact with him, and talk to him about it, then i can have my peace of mind back...finally. after three years. that'd be nice. well, for those of you who pray, pray for me will ya, and this forgiveness issue i'm having. thanks. God bless!
*SCREAM*
01.14.04 (4:51 pm) [edit]OH MY GOSH!!!! I AM GOING TO HURT MY COACH!!!!! ARRRRR!!!! you have no idea how mad i am at her for only the millionth time i've been her player! once again, i am here to say that coach scott is out to get me...or at least get me off the team. her latest punch is little different from the rest...perhaps even more subtle, but still there. we played challenge matches before school was out, right? right. and i beat stephanie, and heather fair and square and purty darn good too. i think heather's was 8-3, and steph's was 8-2. so, needless to say, i am the better player. WRONG!!! or so says coach. she says "you three are just so close, that ya'l are going to play each other again in challenge matches." are you joking me?! ok ok, so maybe some of you don't know my past history with coach here...let me line all her transgressions against me, then perhaps you will understand why i think coach is out to get me.
she plays a peg-leg (broken ankle, with pins stuck in the break, in a brace) FRESHMAN in my doubles spot last year
she flat out tells me i don't have what it takes to be a top player (not exact words...i said that i wanted to be a top player, and she said quote here-"let's be more realistic." that was the end of last year
at the end of last year, she stuck a player-no name, since its not her fault-ahead of me in the line up that i hadn't even played a challenge match with, much less lost to
same thing as above with different player-same peg legged girl-at the beginning of this year
and now this c-rap, having to prove myself twice when i beat those players in the dirt!
not to mention the zillions of times she's snubbed my 'rents and grandparents, and not appreciated how they contribute to the team either
ARRRRRR!!!! ok i am done. *steams*
:x
o ya!
01.14.04 (10:55 am) [edit]forgot to inform all that next period in spanish class, we get to watch pirates of the carribean in espanol!! isn't that exciting! i don't think the sub that will be there would care if anyone else would like view spanish speaking pirates. lol. later...again. :D
super fun guys!
01.14.04 (10:53 am) [edit]bcis is super fun! or not :roll: oh well. have to get this credit somehow. i was either take this class and be bored or take webmastering, and learn something but i've heard that class is hard. forget that! i don't need anymore hard classes.
anyways...
i got smacked in the head by a femur on monday. ya, you know...the thigh bone. matt, my anatomy leg partner reared back with the dumb femur and my head just happened to be in the way. got a nice bruise on my temple to show for it. :D want to see my battle wound? lol
yesterday...hmm...i think i might actually understand the physics assignment! *gasp* i know! isn't it amazing! but i have a ton of homework tonight...study for history test-made myself get ahead last night and finish reading the chapter-, have a large physics homework page to do, and then the english assignment...now, this assignment truely goes to show ms. popey's mental instability. she made us read twain's sarcastic mockery of cooper's deerslayer, and now we have to mock twain's huck finn in the same manner. what vauge instructions! so we're just expected to float around in our heads and figure out what she wants! :roll: i can't read your mind, ms. popey.
nothing else insanly interesting is going on out here in the middle of nowhere. except..
tabitha says, "except tabitha's going cRaZy!!" but that's not it...sorry tabitha. greg's dragging me along to the ahs football banquet tomorrow evening. several hours of droning about what the football team did...and my school's cross town rival team at that! ahh!! oh well. i will need a good laugh after school tomorrow-its going to be chaos-and greg is always quick to provide needed comic relief with many jokes. lol. if its warm enough, i'm going to wear my new pink and black skirt and top. its sooo cute! i've only gotten to wear it once so far. i think the outfit is the only way i'm going to be excited about this event. lol. oh well, gets me out of the house for a few hours anyway.
well, i need to study the wrist bones for my anatomy test next period. :cry: pray everything is going well with all of you...next time i will not talk about dumb things, and tell ya what God's been showing me in judges...quite interesting reading material. and maybe some input from kenny on his latest reading adventure-acts. later all! God bless!
0:-)
01.12.04 (10:19 am) [edit]hello there. sorry to those few of you that actually care what i put on this blog. last week was complete chaos. i was doing last minute winter formal stuff-actually, almost all of it. well, i say i, but actually it was our entire talisam club. props to all you ladies, well done! *applause* then another excuse...didn't write during bcis like a initially set up this blog to do, 'cause kenny was sitting at home and he needed some company, so i used bcis class to talk to him via aim. 0:-) you all still love me right? well, anyway, i will be talking here at least three times this week, since this week is a red week, meaning i will have bcis three times this week! yea! i don't like blue weeks, cause blue days are a ton harder than red days. (i have ALL my ap classes on blue day. if the school would still let us figure our own schedules out, i would have NOT put all my hard classes on one day, and all the easy ones on the other. shesh.) for those of you who are completely lost, here at cooper high, we're on block scheduling.
ooo how exciting...we're starting excel today. *snore* i kinda feel sorry for our teacher. she stands up there at the front of the room, and talks and talks, but no one listens to her at all. we just sit and surt the net, or in my case, chat and blog. 0:-)
they really need to have an angel smilie emoticon on here. that just bugs me. ok, i'm off my soap box. did you know that there really is a soap box. my geography teacher freshman year painted a plyboard box to look like a tide box, and whenever we had something profound to say, she'd make us get up in front of the class and stand on the soap box. maybe it was a not so clever con to get us to be quiet. it didn't work. we all LOVED the soap box. hehe. :D
i'm sure you all want to know what went down for me at winter formal. and if you didn't, well tough nougat, you'll hear it anyway. :wink: ok, so...kenny-my escort for the evening-arrived at my house at 4:30, and we went to sarah's house to get ready promptly. it seems my soap-dove with exfoliating beads *oooo, ahhh*- is too mild or something, cause it caused my entire family to get a rash. luckily mine is just on my cheeks, so it just looks like i have major blush on. *shrugs* it still hurts. tabitha says you can't tell at all :D anyway, that was kinda pooey, but it worked out ok. of course after we all dressed, and sarah's boyfriend, marc finally showed up-well, he was on time for once-we all stood around taking a million bazillion pictures while our mom's went *awww*... :roll: then we all drove over to spano's-terrific italian by the way, for those near by that haven't been. we got to hear live piano too. :D it was super nice, and really not that bad of a price either. well, we now includes me, kenny, sarah, marc, chris g., jenni, luke, and megan. lol. the guys minus kenny had fun cracking jokes at our waiter the entire time, because we assumed he was gay. poor guy. kenny was a good boy, and didn't even laugh at the jokes. i, on the other hand, couldn't contain myself, and did chuckle underneath my astonishment. we did get a pat on the back from some older gentleman that sat at the table beside us. he and his party walked in as we were getting our food, and we had prayer before we ate. the gentleman complemented us on not being ashamed. props to all of us. :D after dinner, we all headed to the actual dance. at first it was really sad, cause no one was dancing, just sitting at what few tables we had sat out, because we always assume people will be dancing anyway, but they weren't. i think the thing that got the dancing going was the electric slide. woo hooo! i finally gave up, cause it seems i've forgotten most of it. :oops: oh well. we did the cumbia, tootsie roll, cha-cha song too. lol. and of course the just plain grind junk...course i stood on the side and danced the G version. :D i was good as long as i was dancing. but it kinda made me sad, cause going to the dance made me realize how i really don't have a close group of pals like i did last year. but hey, my best friend was there, so, i was good to go. when the dance ended at 11:30-it went by sooo fast!- several of us went back to sarah's for a movie. there were a ton of people over there! like twenty or so. we watched mothman prophecy or whatever. it was strange. i would have rather had watched pirates of the carribean like we did at first. after the movie was over, kenny and i left. kenny was to stay at my grandma's so he wouldn't have to drive home so late. so i took him to my grandma's house, and then ran over to my house to drop off my stuff, and pick up my pictures i had taken of artsy stuff to show him, since he's the one that knows lots of stuff about photography. so i showed him my pictures, and he helped me take down my hair. i made him guess how many bobby pins were in my hair...kenny's guess:57 actual:54. he was really close. :wink: after that was done, we decided to grab a snack, and raided my grandma's muffin box. after eating neither of us really cared to part company just yet, so we played a game of parcheesie, and talked well into the morning...like 5 am. lol.
oh no! my excel isn't working! i guess i'll go ahead and finish it here, since it seems i'm going to have to switch comps. exciting. later. God bless!
grrr...
01.05.04 (1:14 pm) [edit]i wrote an awesome blog last night, but there were "technical difficulties" on the tblog server, so it didn't get posted. i am ticked...i will try to recreate it tonight or something, since my tennis lesson got cancelled due to the 18 degrees expected this evening. BRRRRR!!!! that's all i've got to say about that. hehe. guess what? i get to go visit kenny in his "quarintine"! yea!!! so, ya, i'm leaving for kenny's now...later ya'll.
time is short
01.03.04 (10:47 pm) [edit]yup, i haven't written the past few days. lo siento to those who actually do read this on a daily basis, which is very few in number. and i have no time left to write tonight cause kenny kept my on that phone. lol, j/k, kid.
well, the only thing i have to comment on is this...i was looking over at the little list of recent posts, and scanning for something neat looking to read. one of the titles is 'i love josh!' psh, i'm sooo sure. :roll: if i had a nickel for every time i scribbled a "i *heart* (insert initials here) on my hand in the many colors of the rainbow in gel pens when i was in middle school, i would be driving a sports car, living in a large house, or city, that's for sure. shesh.
man, i need to get to sleep. have to get myself back to school schedule and get my shower, and read my devo and a bit of the Good Book in seventeen minutes...tick, tock, tick. later. have a lovely, God blessed day/afternoon/evening...whenever you happen to be reading this pathetic excuse for writting. thanks for putting up with me, by the way!
